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Friday, October 28, 2011

"This Too Shall Pass"

My Mother was released from the Hospital yesterday and is staying with me until we feel that she is able to go back to her house, which is our family home.  Im not quite sure when or if that will ever happen which has lead me to a very introspective place. It simply doesn't seem that long ago that my parents were getting all dressed up to go to some fancy fundraiser.

I can still remember the smell of Shalimar that danced in the hallways after my parents departed.  I would always sneak into my mother's dressing room and curiously poke around observing her makeup and the jewelry that she decided not to wear a particular evening.  My father always enjoyed dressing well and was extremely social and in fact, he always smelled wonderful.  There were many wonderful things going on in our home and as a child, I was in awe of all that surrounded me.

My parents used to throw gigantic parties and our house had a wonderful flow for entertaining.  In the summertime, there would be a big tent and a jazz band playing in the background. The alcohol was flowing and everything was beautifully catered. My Mother's attention to detail combined with my father's warmth and friendliness left everyone with a marvelous feeling.  My parents always wanted us to be present at all of their social gatherings so my brothers and I also delighted in all of the festivities.

We were able to stay up until the end and my parents put very few restraints or requirements on us while they entertained. It was so much fun as a child to wander around and socialize with all of my fathers business associates and friends. My father was a doctor so I have spent a great deal of time around the medical community and to this day feel extremely comfortable around doctors. In fact, many of my closest friends are physicians which I suspect is no surprise.

My Mother was on the Board of the Auxillary and highly involved in the publicity of many of the Hospital's grand events. She was always proud to be so active and I suspect that this position gave her the feedback that one would feel from a traditional paying job.  My father was chairman of his group for fifteen years while my Mother was always thrilled to entertain and introduce the latest members of the practice to the rest of the Medical community.

My parents did a nice tango together and complimented each other in every way. I suspect that is why it is so difficult now that my Father is gone.  My mother has never had any health issues until after my Father died... within a five year period everything that could go wrong has in fact gone wrong.  It's sad to see my Mother aging but Im happy that Im here.  Life has a funny way of working out accordingly. If I stayed married I would be living in California right now.  I would feel horrible that I would not be able to contribute to the care of my aging mother in a meaningful way.  It would bother me that she would not have the proximity to her grandchildren who bring such delight to her life.

So, as I looked out my window this morning admiring the gorgeous color of the leaves- I heard my Father saying "this too shall pass"- cheer up Michelle.  Thanks Dad for leaving such beautiful memories behind. You continue to comfort me with all of the gentleness and loving concern that you left behind.  Im blessed to have had you as a father. I will take care of my Mother as I took care of you and I believe in your words... "this too shall pass". xo

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