I know the seasons in the city, the smell of fall when the city is crowded with freshman faces walking around with anticipation and excitement of the school year. The peacefulness of the summer when there are so many Europeans in the city and the noise of kids has diminished. All of these aspects of Boston I know and love.
When my ex husband was offered a big spot on a New York radio station he couldn't refuse, we had to leave. I left my friends, my job, my high-rise and my lifestyle. I left a place that nourished my soul and gave me room to grow without boundaries. I emphasized the importance of me living near my family at this difficult moment in time and thus we ended up in Fairfield County.
It was nice to move back home where I grew up. It was nice to know that my children would grow up in a place that was so riddled with culture and intelligence. It was wonderful to spend time with my father in the years prior to his death. It was comforting that I would be able to help my Mother in all of her needs going forward. Im happy that I somehow ended up back here. I just didn't' think that it would present such challenge.
I never anticipated the mountains that were waiting for me as I made my way back home. The death of my father is the one that I struggle with the most. My divorce and raising two children entirely alone and living in a place where I have to drive to get anywhere. I used to walk out of my door to vibrancy, energy and a variety of cultures. I have to worry about my Mother living alone and her adjusting to the difficulty of life without my loving father.
I have to be 1000 percent available to my children as my ex-husband lives in California. I have to manage every aspect of life in addition to the unexpected challenges that occur on a daily basis.
The most important thing that I have to do is remain strong and happy. I celebrate all that I have despite it's challenges. I have loving people in my life who care about me as do my children. I have the best friends that one could ask for. I have healthy and intelligent happy children who are thriving.
They respect all that I do and appreciate the rootedness that I have continually provide to them.
So in saying goodbye to Boston- I suppose I said goodbye to a freedom that can only come when you are free of obligation. I recognize that this time in my life is more about raising happy children and tending to my family than frolicking around my favorite city.
Boston is still there waiting for me to return. In time I believe this is where I will end up but that won't happen until I have successfully launched my children and life takes its addition turns. Time goes by quickly - life goes by quickly. Do not lose site of what makes your soul thrive and try to embrace the difficulties that you must endure.
In the words of Eleanor Roosevelt- "You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say, I lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along. You must do the thing you think that you cannot do."
Strong words with a terrific message. Enjoy your weekend xo