Tuesday, July 12, 2011
Friends and Fun !
My summer truly has been about friendship and simplicity. I have been in such a relaxed mood that there are days where I don't even bother straightening my hair. For those who know me, this is a big deal. I usually blow dry and flat iron and put a little Morrocan Oil in and Im good to go. Lately I have been going au natural and Giavanna is digging my curly wild hair. Im assuming this is because she despises the brushing process, and she is starting to look like Bob Marley's daughter. I printed out a photo of Bob to show her what her hair is going to look like by the start of school and she laughed.
My next move will be to print it out and tape it to her mirror. I too disliked getting my hair brushed as a little girl so I get where she is coming from. My Mom gets a kick out of the similarity- after she reprimands me for not brushing every tangle out of her hair. Perfectionism runs in my family and my Mother is patient enough to apply that to every area of life. Patience is not my strong suit except if Im waiting for my Vineyard Vines Pocketbook to get marked down. Anyhow...
My new friend came over last night- we had such a nice, insightful and fun evening. She is getting divorced and we were delighting in positive conversation. She is looking forward to the freedom and sense of independence that is rounding the bend. The liberation that comes when a new chapter is begun is beyond exhilarating. I really like her- we are very similar and have the same sense of humor. The big difference however is that she likes a craft- I however cringe at the thought of a craft. I will elaborate on that another day. We really had a great time and Im looking forward to a new found friendship. I will help her through the hellish process that she will undoubtedly go through. I have plenty of experience in regard to the process of divorce and the fall out that Im happy to share
I always try to help women by openly discussing my divorce experience. I am honest about all of it. I have the hope that this will spare them from some of the difficulty that I had years ago. I wish someone did the same for me but most people have major discomfort when it comes to sharing their adversity. People do not want to expose the fact that their life isn't perfect. The illusion of perfection beams radiantly all over Fairfield County. It is truly an illusion as some of the relationships that I think are wonderful, indeed are riddled with drama and despair. It's like the builder who tells me his business is booming right now- really because no one else has any work. Interesting how "he" can't keep up with all of the clients demands. Perhaps he could spread the wealth- just an idea.
My friend and I drank wine, ate figs with cheese and chatted for hours about our kids, our former- or rather almost former spouse and other fun topics. In fact, the question of how to address ones "almost" ex husband came up. It's a funny thought as we could not come up with anything except "the baby daddy". Im not sure that this would work out so well but it is rather amusing. I have to laugh, we all have to laugh- that is the only thing that will save you throughout the challenges in one's lifetime. Yes, all might be smooth sailing today but tomorrow you may have a mountain to climb. Surround yourself with great friends, nice music, good wine, intelligent things, culture and laughter. You will never regret any of those things and in fact your life will be that much more enjoyable. I followed my fathers advice- so far so good.... xo