I think Im being punished for my indulgence. A friend of mine was over for dinner Monday night and with good intention brought over one of my favorite things, Baklava. I don't know about you but I believe that this sweet treat was created as some sort of offering for the Gods. To make matters worse, this baklava which was from a gourmet store- was drenched in a rich dark chocolate. This was a sinful combination that I had never experienced. Apparently the walnuts drenched in honey were not fattening enough so chocolate had to be added.
I had a small piece last night and declared that this was not something that I should ever eat. I don't keep stuff like this in my house because I like to avoid the option of going near it. Too yummy, too fattening and just over all too too everything. Thankfully my kids don't like sweets. I wanted to throw it out but then I felt guilty and concerned that my friend might want to come see me again for more Baklava. Such a funny thought and how could I explain that I threw it out so I wouldn't be tempted to eat it. What a sad commentary on my self control. I usually give food that I don't want to my sitter but she is New York City and my neighbors would think it odd if I rang there doorbell with dessert in hand. Needless to say, the Baklava remained under my roof which I knew was a bad idea.
I awoke this morning to see the Chocolate Baklava sitting on my island in the kitchen. Oh no, I thought please not last night's temptation this early in the morning. At this point, you must know that it is most likely no later than 5:30 a.m. How pathetic that my first thought of the day is that Chocolate Baklava just might be a great way to start my morning. Not exactly Mueslix, but it would give me a different kind of energy to begin my day. Im repulsed that this thought even crosses my mind and I happily place the darn dessert away. Out of site is certainly out of mind.
Tonight, however was a different story. I caved in around midnight which is the worst possible time to cave in. Come on Michelle, the day is over and you remained treat free. Go watch Anderson Cooper and have a diet cream soda. The kids are finally asleep, Christopher is packed for his school trip and Giavanna actually went to bed without the usual request of me staying in her bed until she fell asleep. Time for me, late indeed but at least the house was still. As I sat watching the destruction of Tornadoes across the country, I started to think of my son leaving on his school trip for a few days. I needed a slight distraction and I knew where to find it.
The Chocolate Baklava won. I ate a big piece of it and immediately felt not only sick to my stomach but mad at myself for letting go. I threw the rest out and vowed to never touch it again. It was way to good to enter my house.
I went back to Anderson Cooper and just as I started to relax....I heard the sound of little Giavanna feet and there she was in her Hello Kitty Pajamas looking so cute. "Mommy, I don't feel good, my tummy hurts". She threw up all over the chair I was sitting in as well as my favorite Ralph Lauren pillow that I have had for twenty years. As I gently helped her and cleaned her up she was smiling at me. Thank you my Giavanna, I will certainly never eat Chocolate Baklava again as it is now reminds me of throw up. Who needs will power with that memory forever imprinted in my mind.
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